In the early stages of a relationship, everything will feel so sweet and so romantic… like a page pulled out of a splendid fairy tale.
Sadly this giddy feeling often fades off at some point, leaving the partners stripped and wondering if they are still in love at all. This is usually the stage where many relationships crash owing to the fact that partners no longer feel the initial feelings with which they set out in the relationship or just because they fail to notice its presence.
But according to couples who have been together for 30 years and more, this is what love feels like with the right person, the one with whom you can spend forever and still hope to have them, if given the chance of another life.
Feels like you’ve known each other forever
Mrs. Onyinye says when she started dating her husband in 1984, it felt like they had known each other forever and even when they got married in 1985 it only felt natural. 32 years later, their three daughters are now happily married and they are still very happy together.
Accept each other
Truth of the matter is that, regardless of how much we want our partners to be like us, there is always a sense of individuality in every single person, realizing this goes a long way in sustaining a long, healthy and lasting relationship. Partners that will last together accept each other the way they are from the onset. They take themselves as they are – no attempt to change or turn the other person around to suit their ‘taste’. Acceptance is KEY.
“He always accepted me with the baggage I came with. When I look at my husband today, I see the same guy I fell in love with 53 years ago.” Says Madam Olufunke.
You don’t just love each other
A lasting relationship often exists between partners who can go a long way with themselves without any scar of boredom, they enjoy the company of one another without compromising on any aspect of themselves. If a relationship is going to last long, you’ll discover from an early stage that you and that partner will love each other, and also like each other.
Mrs. Suliat says “after 39 years, my husband and I still like each other a lot. We’re together almost every moment of every day and still find laughter.”
They do little things to make you happy
Love is indeed a beautiful thing and it remains to be found in the little things and one way to identify a partner who’ll be with you for a quite long time is their ability and willingness to do little things to make you happy.
“After almost half a century together, I would marry my husband all over again. He knows how much pleasure I [find in little things]. After all these years, he still adores me and I adore him.” Says Naomi, married for 43 years.
Despite the individuality shared above, a great relationship as well must have values that aligns the partners, these value must be core to them to keep the bonding glued always. When you find someone with whom you have similar goals, similar ideas and a significant merge of values and things that mean a lot to you, then you can be sure that you will be with such person for long.
“Too many people expect perfection from their spouse, but people aren’t perfect. The fact that we wanted the same things out of life was the sign to me that we were meant to be.” Says Nana, a grandma married for 41 years.
Caveat: Names of characters in this piece are purely fictional and any coincidence with real life person is never intentional.